Thursday, December 31, 2015

The Big Fat Mermaid by Dweezel and Pallie @goddessfish

The Big Fat Mermaid
by Dweezel and Pallie

GENRE: Middle Grade Fractured fairy tales


She's nasty, she's gross, and she's anything but little. All Aria the mermaid princess wants is to stuff her face full of food, but what happens when her dad, the king, tries to stop her? The answer: laughs beyond belief! Watch as Aria deals with her mean dad, a chubby-chasing prince, a harpoon wielding sea captain, and, in a grand final battle, the monstrous water witch herself.

Aria will bite, belch, and fart her way into your heart in this second installment of the Funny Stories for Kids series, brought to you by the famed Dweezel and Pallie.


Outside, at the prince’s stables, with the smell of hay and horse...

“Maybe the dancing was a little too much to start with,” said Daniel, wearing riding pants and readying a fine dappled mare. “A nice, peaceful ride in the country will be the perfect way to show you the principality!”

“I dunno…” said Aria, eyeing the big animal uneasily.

“Don’t worry,” said Daniel. “You’ll love it!”

Daniel gave orders for a servant to help lift Aria onto the horse. After he screamed out in pain, clutching his back, more servants were called. Grunting and pushing with all their might they managed to get Aria onto the horse.

The horses legs began to shake.

“Uh-oh!” called a servant. “Stand back.”

“My dapple!” cried the fat, bald groom.

“It’s too late,” said a man, holding the groom back. “There’s no helping her now…”

A few loud snaps, then horse collapsed.

It was dead.

AUTHOR Bio and Links:

Dr. Dweezel and Professor Pallie have become famed in their respective fields for outstanding contributions. For nearly a decade they have collaborated on the recording of lost ancient texts and tales.

To download "The Big Fat Mermaid" visit:


Dweezel and Pallie will be awarding a $30 Amazon/BN GC to a randomly drawn winner via rafflecopter during the tour.

a Rafflecopter giveaway


Goddess Fish Promotions said...

Thanks for hosting!

Betty Woodrum said...

Great post, thank you!

Becky Richardson said...

Enjoyed the excerpt.

Rita said...

I liked the excerpt. Happy New Year!

Parnassus Pallie said...

Happy New year!
Thank you for hosting us.
We are glad that everyone is enjoying our story excerpt. If anyone has any questions please ask them, I am eager to answer.

Victoria Alexander said...

Thanks for sharing! Happy new year everyone :)

melissa crisp said...

Hope everyone has a happy new year. Thanks for sharing.

melissa crisp said...

Hope everyone has a happy new year. Thanks for sharing.

Lisa Brown said...

Thank you for the chance to win :)

Ally Swanson said...

I enjoyed reading the excerpt. This book sounds like a fun and interesting read! Totally looking forward to checking this book out!